The following is an extract from an email sent by a colleague, about things that the students should not do in their hostel rooms (word-for-word, complete and unabridged - except for omissions to protect privacy). I personally find it amusing (not the gist of the message, but rather the author's style of writing and expressions). Would you be amused as well? Read and you'll find out.
No smoking in the room
Reason: Smoking might cause the lung cancer. Therefore, we are big brother and sister should look after our students’ health. Remember our government had launched a non-smoking campaign "Tak Nak Merokok" two years ago? Smoking also cause other non-smoking residents feel annoying. So, we must help them. If they are already addicted, so we have to advise them to smoke outside our campus.
No Sharp items in the room like, Samurai and sword
Reason: All these weapons might hurt other residents. We will confiscate all these weapons. I know, in the market, there are certain weapons like samurai can be used as room decoration. But, this has to get the permission from (omitted)
No alcohol drink
Reason: This might cause the student become drunkard!! Once they become drunkard, they might cause a lot of problems in the Hostel. I remember the case four years ago which happened in the (omitted). One Indonesian student get drunk, and he try to commit suicide. Luckily, we had stopped him jumped from fourth floor.
No refrigerator in the room
Reason: This might cause our electricity bill increase. Not only that, the fuse might blow so often. Actually, we have to identify those electrical equipment’s power rating. Those equipments’ power rating more than 900 W will be confiscated. Microwave oven also not allowed in the room
No pets in the room
Reason: apart from fish, no other pets allowed to keep in the room
No gambling in the room
Reason: illegal gambling will be reported to (omitted)
No illegal residents stay in the room
Reason: This one, I want to highlight at here is: for those students who already graduated, they are not allowed to stay in with their friends. This was happened quite often all the time. So, we have to open our eyes big Big and BIG! to monitor this issue...
Are you amused? Have a great day ahead. :)